Looking on the Bright Side
(Published on nwitimes.com) (October 9, 2016)
So much for the afterglow.
One week after the Bears injected their fanbase with a jubilation infusion after defeating the Detroit Lions, they gave their embattled followers another dose. This one, however, may as well have been prescribed by Dr. Jack Kevorkian given how poisonous it was.
A loss to the lousy Indianapolis Colts has a way of draining one's life force. Especially when said defeat drops the Bears to 1-4, leaving everyone, from wide receiver Alshon Jeffery to Bears coach John Fox, in a foul mood.
After the game, Jeffery was notably agitated his downfield capabilities are dying on the vine thanks to a quarterback (Brian Hoyer) whose play falls under the category of "plucky" and perhaps even "heady" but doesn't inspire folk singers to write songs about his prowess at throwing the deep ball.
When media members asked Fox about Hoyer's inability to connect with Jeffery late in Sunday's game, Fox responded, as all good coaches do, by twice mocking them for eating hot dogs in the press box.
In my experience, when someone insults me about my penchant for devouring hot dogs, I've found either A) That person has terrible culinary taste, because hot dogs are delicious, or B) They don't want to face the reality they are in the midst of a ruinous season and will be fired as coach of the Chicago Bears sooner rather than later.
The irony is this game that inspired so much vitriol was actually the Bears' most encouraging loss of the year.
While Hoyer, clearly, is not the long-term answer at quarterback, his sturdy efforts have made Jay Cutler more expendable than he already was. That, in itself, is a victory for a fanbase that is as famished for good fortune as a pet is for table scraps.
Couple Hoyer's quasi-heroics with superb performances from rookie running back Jordan Howard (16 carries, 118 rushing yards) and second-year wide receiver Cameron Meredith (9 receptions, 130 yards, 1 touchdown), and maybe there's hope for the Bears yet.
Perhaps a team many assumed was bereft of young talent may have some building blocks after all. And if those players happen to be local products (Howard attended Indiana University while Meredith went to Illinois State University), all the better.
And really, even the game's outcome was probably for the best. Had the Bears upended Indianapolis, they would have whipped the city into a modest lather regarding their fraudulent playoff prospects. A victory over Jacksonville this Sunday would have evened the Bears' record at 3-3, causing fans to pore over crackpot playoff scenarios more convoluted than Mr. Robot's mental makeup.
Now though, Bears fans can avoid the dizzying highs of playoff fever followed by the terrifying lows of heart-wrenching losses. Like a lit cigarette, the Bears stubbed out their postseason chances on our collective foreheads. And we are better for it.
Rather than wasting our time fantasizing about Bears football in January, we can focus our attention on the important things in life: Loving our family, raising our children, drinking plenty of fluids and eating copious amounts of hot dogs.
So much for the afterglow.
One week after the Bears injected their fanbase with a jubilation infusion after defeating the Detroit Lions, they gave their embattled followers another dose. This one, however, may as well have been prescribed by Dr. Jack Kevorkian given how poisonous it was.
A loss to the lousy Indianapolis Colts has a way of draining one's life force. Especially when said defeat drops the Bears to 1-4, leaving everyone, from wide receiver Alshon Jeffery to Bears coach John Fox, in a foul mood.
After the game, Jeffery was notably agitated his downfield capabilities are dying on the vine thanks to a quarterback (Brian Hoyer) whose play falls under the category of "plucky" and perhaps even "heady" but doesn't inspire folk singers to write songs about his prowess at throwing the deep ball.
When media members asked Fox about Hoyer's inability to connect with Jeffery late in Sunday's game, Fox responded, as all good coaches do, by twice mocking them for eating hot dogs in the press box.
In my experience, when someone insults me about my penchant for devouring hot dogs, I've found either A) That person has terrible culinary taste, because hot dogs are delicious, or B) They don't want to face the reality they are in the midst of a ruinous season and will be fired as coach of the Chicago Bears sooner rather than later.
The irony is this game that inspired so much vitriol was actually the Bears' most encouraging loss of the year.
While Hoyer, clearly, is not the long-term answer at quarterback, his sturdy efforts have made Jay Cutler more expendable than he already was. That, in itself, is a victory for a fanbase that is as famished for good fortune as a pet is for table scraps.
Couple Hoyer's quasi-heroics with superb performances from rookie running back Jordan Howard (16 carries, 118 rushing yards) and second-year wide receiver Cameron Meredith (9 receptions, 130 yards, 1 touchdown), and maybe there's hope for the Bears yet.
Perhaps a team many assumed was bereft of young talent may have some building blocks after all. And if those players happen to be local products (Howard attended Indiana University while Meredith went to Illinois State University), all the better.
And really, even the game's outcome was probably for the best. Had the Bears upended Indianapolis, they would have whipped the city into a modest lather regarding their fraudulent playoff prospects. A victory over Jacksonville this Sunday would have evened the Bears' record at 3-3, causing fans to pore over crackpot playoff scenarios more convoluted than Mr. Robot's mental makeup.
Now though, Bears fans can avoid the dizzying highs of playoff fever followed by the terrifying lows of heart-wrenching losses. Like a lit cigarette, the Bears stubbed out their postseason chances on our collective foreheads. And we are better for it.
Rather than wasting our time fantasizing about Bears football in January, we can focus our attention on the important things in life: Loving our family, raising our children, drinking plenty of fluids and eating copious amounts of hot dogs.